That's right kiddies ... from now until the end of the month, the 28th, National Tooth Fairy Day ... or, if you prefer ... National Inconvenience Yourself Day, you can get a free ringtone from three songs off the the Flight of the Atombee* cd.

Three tones available right now are:

1. Atom Bee and Birdie
   
2. Serenity Applicator
3. Molecule Men 

Click here to go to Sun Pop Blue Ringtone Store and download a FREE ringtone! 

Now, on the first of March, or thereabouts, we will be adding a bunch more analogue synthesizer ringtones, mostly serge, of course. But they will be for sale. Not free anymore! So get yours while supplies last! And tell your friends!

Who loves you, baby?

*official soundtrack to Flapping.

Well ... what are you waiting for?

It has been reported that Senator David Vitter, R-Lousiana, was fond of being diapered by prostitutes he hired from the call-girl operation run by Deborah Jeane Palfrey, otherwise known as the DC Madam.

Now, when I first heard that another Repube had been caught in a sex-scandal, I thought it inconsistent with what is known about the modern Republican Party: the prostitutes in question were neither (a) male, nor (b) underage.

But then I heard about the diapers and it all fell into place. 

And here are some of his ads from a few years ago,  reminding us that the Senator is an All-American Family Man. The first ad is particularly appropriate. Thank you, Talking Points Memo.

*Disclaimer: I did not photoshop Vitter's face onto a picture of Karl Rove's body here. Rove is much fatter and whiter. 

If I woke up in the morning and had to look in the mirror and say,"Knox, you are a DJ!," I would put a bullet through my head.

If you are a DJ, and you are reading this, it is not too late for you. You may be addicted to the easy money and easier women, and you may not ever, ever have the discipline required to make real art, but you can escape the soul-killing shame of pretending to possess some skills, knowledge, or talent, beyond sucking ass for bookings, and buying other peoples' records to play. Write me: there is a solution. 

The Manual at www.instrumentality.com.

I had the classic book on the science, art, craft ... the mojo required to produce a Number One Hit in Great Britain, The Manual (on how to get a #1 hit the easy way), on my website, instrumentality.com, for many years. It was the only the only thing people came to look at, I think. And then a couple people asked for pdf's of the book within a week. I suggested they do the right thing and buy the damn book. And then,

the lightbulb went on. 

"Why not get a commission from Amazon?"

So I took the book down & linked to the book through the affiliate thing. Now I realize there are no copies available. Soooooo ... I've put this treasure back online.

I'm sorry for violating copyright. I am sorry for stealing from the KLF. But I secretly believe they know the extent of my crimes. And are smiling.

My intro from the site: 

With all due respect to the copyright notices below, Instrumentality presents The KLF's "The Manual" on how to get a number one hit in England. This document is as insightful, if not moreso, into the workings of the music business and the making of songs as any other texts we've ever encountered.

Essential for anybody interested in music, or the music business, or looking for a good reason to get out of the music business.

And herewith a few excerpts from the masterpiece:

firstly, you must be skint and on the dole. anybody with a proper job or tied up with full time education will not have the time to devote to see it through. also, being on the dole gives you a clearer perspective on how much of society is run. if you are already a musician stop playing your instrument. even better, sell the junk. it will become clearer later on but just take our word for it for the time being. sitting around tinkering with the portastudio or musical gear (either ancient or modern) just complicates and distracts you from the main objective. even worse than being a musician is being a musician in a band. real bands never get to number one - unless they are puppets.

if you are in a band you will undoubtedly be aware of the petty squabbles and bitching that develops within them. this only festers and grows proportionately as the band gets bigger and no band ever grows out of it. all bands end in tantrums, tears and bitter acrimony. the myth of a band being gang of lads out "against" the world (read as "to change", "to shag" or "to save the world") is pure wishful thinking to keep us all buying the records and reading the journals. mind you, it's a myth that many band members want to believe themselves.

so if in a band, quit. get out. now.