The Manual at www.instrumentality.com.

I had the classic book on the science, art, craft ... the mojo required to produce a Number One Hit in Great Britain, The Manual (on how to get a #1 hit the easy way), on my website, instrumentality.com, for many years. It was the only the only thing people came to look at, I think. And then a couple people asked for pdf's of the book within a week. I suggested they do the right thing and buy the damn book. And then,

the lightbulb went on. 

"Why not get a commission from Amazon?"

So I took the book down & linked to the book through the affiliate thing. Now I realize there are no copies available. Soooooo ... I've put this treasure back online.

I'm sorry for violating copyright. I am sorry for stealing from the KLF. But I secretly believe they know the extent of my crimes. And are smiling.

My intro from the site: 

With all due respect to the copyright notices below, Instrumentality presents The KLF's "The Manual" on how to get a number one hit in England. This document is as insightful, if not moreso, into the workings of the music business and the making of songs as any other texts we've ever encountered.

Essential for anybody interested in music, or the music business, or looking for a good reason to get out of the music business.

And herewith a few excerpts from the masterpiece:

firstly, you must be skint and on the dole. anybody with a proper job or tied up with full time education will not have the time to devote to see it through. also, being on the dole gives you a clearer perspective on how much of society is run. if you are already a musician stop playing your instrument. even better, sell the junk. it will become clearer later on but just take our word for it for the time being. sitting around tinkering with the portastudio or musical gear (either ancient or modern) just complicates and distracts you from the main objective. even worse than being a musician is being a musician in a band. real bands never get to number one - unless they are puppets.

if you are in a band you will undoubtedly be aware of the petty squabbles and bitching that develops within them. this only festers and grows proportionately as the band gets bigger and no band ever grows out of it. all bands end in tantrums, tears and bitter acrimony. the myth of a band being gang of lads out "against" the world (read as "to change", "to shag" or "to save the world") is pure wishful thinking to keep us all buying the records and reading the journals. mind you, it's a myth that many band members want to believe themselves.

so if in a band, quit. get out. now.

The Fab Four on Top o' the Pops

black american records have always been the most reliable source of dance groove. these records down through the years have inevitably laid so much emphasis on the altar of groove and so very little into fulfilling the other golden rules that they very rarely break through into the u.k. top ten, let alone making the number one spot. a by-product of this situation is that gangsters of the groove from bo diddley on down believe they have been ripped off, not only by the business but by all the artists that have followed on from them. this is because the copyright laws that have grown over the past one hundred years have all been developed by whites of european descent and these laws state that fifty per cent of the copyright of any song should be for the lyrics, the other fifty per cent for the top line (sung) melody; groove doesn't even get a look in. if the copyright laws had been in the hands of blacks of african descent, at least eighty per cent would have gone to the creators of the groove, the remainder split between the lyrics and the melody. if perchance you are reading this and you are both black and a lawyer, make a name for yourself. right the wrongs.

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