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Popbitch: brit wit gossip

Friday, 01 December 2006

I love the free weekly newsletter email I get from POPBITCH ::, a british gossip on rock, pop, movie stars, politicians, culture, and very oddball humor. Subscribe today!

Here is a sampling from one recent week's post:

POPBITCH           _     _ _
_ __   ___ _ __ | |__ (_) |_ ___| |__
| '_ \ / _ \| '_ \| '_ \| | __/ __| '_ \
| |_) | (_) | |_) | |_) | | || (__| | | |
| .__/ \___/| .__/|_.__/|_|\__\___|_| |_|
|_|         |_|    04.05.06 ISSUE 299
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go to http://www.popbitch.com

* Charles Clarke - ear today, gone tomorrow
* Kurtis Blow's fantasy football
* Charts: Gnarls Barkley is still number one
-----------------------------------------------------
Project Hurley <<
         Model, actress, TV presenter?

    Sky TV crew members are gutted that Liz Hurley
    has ruled herself out of presenting another
    series of Project Catwalk. Her appearances
    on the first series were priceless. She
    had trouble pronouncing things and could be
    found wandering around the set chanting
    things like "Patrix Cock, Patrix Cock,
    Patrick Cox..." And she had an assistant to
    help her understand which expressions
    she was achieving on camera who stood behind
    a monitor shouting out things like
     "More happy!" or "Less eyebrow".

Ear today, gone tomorrow <<
        Home Secretary waxes lyrical on TV

     Charles Clarke's woes are not complete. Word
     reaches us from BBC about an interview the
     Home Secretary once did for them. Clarke had
     belligerently berated the crew about his
     ear piece being faulty, and messing up
     his live appearance, before storming off.

     The sound technician quickly discovered what
     the problem was. The ear piece had been
     jammed... with an enormous piece of ear wax.
     Expect Clarke to resign in embarrassment.

Suck it and see and more << on the flipflop

Suck it and see <<
         Eton education finally pays off

    Salvation may be at hand for the government.
    There is finally a story that would get
    the bad news off the front pages. Tabloid
    tittle-tattle says that a photo which appears
    to show Prince Harry demonstrating his oral
    sex skills on a doll is being hawked around.

-----------------------------------------------------
Llamas eat less than sheep and cattle on a weight-
ratio basis. One llama eats about four bales of hay
per month. When content, a llama hums.
----------------------------------------------------
Big Questions <<
        Who people are asking this week

    Which film actress has just separated from her
    husband, but possibly would have done so earlier
    if she had read "big questions" last
    September, where his bit-on-the-side claimed
    that as he climaxed the husband had once
    shouted, "I love you, my dick love you, I wish
    I could rip my dick off and give it to you."

-----------------------------------------------------
The city of Chicago has banned foie gras.
-----------------------------------------------------

Fantasy Football <<
        Kurtis Blow - new soccer fan

    Hip-hop legend Kurtis Blow was appearing at
    Brixton Academy last weekend. He tried to
    engage the crowd in some Brit-centric banter:

    "So who is gonna win the World Cup?
    England? France? Barcelona?"

-----------------------------------------------------
Donald Trump is to become an ambassador for Scotland.
-----------------------------------------------------

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